Friday, March 28, 2003

I'm happy to annouce that the WashU CS Softball Team, also known as J-Rock's Danger Squad, has moved on to the next round of the playoffs and remains undefeated. After serving up a 21-0 trouncing, we're ready to take on all comers. The game MVP went to Dr. Sally Goldman, who set the tone early with a sparkling defensive play at 2nd base and followed it up with a series of solid hits.

My line, approximately:
2-2, 1 HR, 1 2B, 4 RBI, 2 R, 1 cup of blood lost*.

*I unfortunately ripped up both my knees pretty bad after stumbling past home plate; attempting to avoid the middle-aged lady catcher who was standing with both feet on the plate. Next time I guess I should just take her out, Pete Rose in the Allstar game - style.

Wednesday, March 26, 2003

How long do we have to wait until we get a President who can dunk?
Don't ask me how, or why, but the other day I started surfing around various Iron Chef themed websites. And it turns out that there's a lot of interesting information out there.* For example:

Iron Chef Sakai is known as quite the lady killer in Japan.

Iron Chef Chen Kenichi always gets pegged for battles vs. women chefs because he's lost several. (So dishonorable!)

Iron Chef Kobe (the Italian chef) desperately wanted his own pillar to enter the stadium on.

There was some sort of Iron Chef Video Game for the Japanese Sega Saturn.

Chairman Kaga isn't really an eccentric millionaire, but he really is named Takeshi Kaga, and it seems like "The Chairman" begins not far from where the real Kaga ends, if you know what I mean. He's quite the actor/singer extraordinaire, and has plenty of other credits on his resume, such as roles in "Jesus Chris Superstar", "West Side Story", "MacBeth", and "Jekyl and Hyde" (which was recently manned on Broadway by David Hasselhoff, in a strange coincidence). But he's best known for his role as Jean Valjean in "Les Miserables", which you can find hilarious pictures of here. He has also sung the "Ware wa collector" song in the Pokemon movie, and raps in a song called "Bozu de Seppo".

If anyone can find clips of either one of these songs or other interesting info, please spread the word - knowledge is power.

*Lots of Information? On the Internet? No way!!!

Sunday, March 23, 2003

My case for not having a junk mail filter: You don't get things like this:

Also, I have two words regarding the Oscars: BOOOOOOOOOOOOO CHICAGO

P.S. Although it was nice to see Spirted Away to not only show up, but win something ... I was beginning to think I had dreamed the whole thing.

Friday, March 21, 2003

In honor of the NCAA Basketball Tournament kickoff, (yes, I did pick Central Michigan over Creighton, thank you very much), and following my precedent of maintaining an active list of silly names in sports, I (or, technically, Page 2's Dan Shanoff) present The 2003 NCAA Tourney All-Name Teams.

Tuesday, March 18, 2003

A few odds and ends on TV:

Is it just me, or has The Real World progressed (or regressed, more accurately) to the point where it could not possibly be any further away from the real world?

People are complaining about the possibility that live shows like American Idol might get preempted when war breaks out.

An update from long ago: Slamball is somehow still on the air, thank goodness.

How are shows like Good Morning Miami, Eight Simple Rules for Dating My Teenage Daughter, and The World According to Jim still on the air? These shows seem like they were designed from the ground up to be watched by absolutely no one...

Speaking of ABC's Tuesday Lineup, I wonder how many people refuse to ever watch Monday Night Football again, after being forced to view previews from that lineup on every single stoppage of play.

And while I'm on this ABC kick, am I the only one who thinks Drew Carey has never been even remotely funny?

One show I'm happy they brought back: Let's Make A Deal. The best part: the set is done in a garish, 70's-style motif, like the one that is still featured on The Price is Right. No computer graphics characters. No spotlights in a dark studio. No subdued, futuro-technic Who Wants to be a Millionaire / Weakest Link color scheme. And the host has one of those long, skinny microphones, like the one Gene Rayburn from Match Game used to hold. You're allright, Let's Make A Deal, you're allright.

Saturday, March 15, 2003

About a week ago, I got a hit from somebody searching for "the last attack by the Vikings was said to be an act of vengence, what for?" Well, Mr. Poorly-Educated Yahoo searcher, I feel responsible for providing you with the content you so desperately need.

If you are referring to the Vikings who destroyed most of Europe during the middle ages, their last act of vengence was probably a response to the general contempt that everyone treated them with, brought about by fact that they killed just about everyone they met. And they kinda smelled funny.

If you are referring to the Vikings that play in the NFL, their last act of vengence was probably a response to the general contempt that everyone treated them with, brought about by fact Randy Moss and Chris Carter play for them. And they kinda smelled funny.

I hope this helps. Keep those searches comin'....

Wednesday, March 12, 2003

The views expressed here do not reflect my views on vegetarianism or the views of this station, but they are awfully funny. There is a certain je ne sais quoi about furry animals in a pot that makes me smile.

Tuesday, March 11, 2003

It's been a while since I've done a movie review, and I know that it's somewhat worthless to put up a review of a movie that's on its way out of theaters, but I'm going to do it anyway, for posterity's sake. Just try to stop me. So the movie is Shanghai Knights. Yes, the plot doesn't really go anywhere and yes the whole thing doesn't really tie together and yes we all should be required to hate movies that have a pun in their name, but that's not what I'm going to harp on, because it was pretty enjoyable to watch. There's nothing like Jackie Chan movies if you like fight scenes in ridiculous places, and this has plenty. Along with the standard setup locations like a farmer's market or a room full of priceless antiques you get places like a wax museum and a revolving door in a hotel lobby. As for the cast, Buddy Films are a dime a dozen these days and in my opinion, Chan & Wilson show here that they are the best of the (mostly horrible) bunch. Owen Wilson also seems perfectly suited for his part in this film and the original Shanghai Noon; every other acting role he gets seems to be a poor reflection of this one. Plus he teases an orphan kid about not having any parents. Finally, as is always the case in Jackie Chan movies, the outtakes are almost worth the price of admission alone. 3 stars.

Sunday, March 09, 2003

If you are a WWF-style wrestler, and your theme/gimmick is Computer Science, then you should be required by law to use the phrase "mega-hurts" in your pre-fight trash talking. For example

I'm going to put the mega-hurts on The Ultimate Warrior this friday night

Thursday, March 06, 2003

At the risk of being very Monopaddle-ish, here is a random link that will waste your time in an enjoyable manner.

*Thanks to my cousins Andrew & Jonathan on this one.

Tuesday, March 04, 2003

The monkey fashion show saga continues. As I've mentioned, there was a site with actual pics from the show on google yesterday, before it too got bumped off the list altogether, by Rubidium, of all places. I can't wait to find out what the single google monkey fashion show link will be tomorrow....this is something that I should start taking bets on....

Does google only show one matching link nowadays? What the heck is going on?

P.S. For those of you who didn't get to see the site with real pictures while it was up, here it is. Also, it's evidently somehow associated with the worst Jackie Chan movie ever, The Tuxedo. The plot thickens....:

Monday, March 03, 2003

Well, my day in the monkey fashion show sun lasted, well, exactly one day. Some other blog that actually has pictures of the monkey show has replaced me, and, as I have said before (sort of), I'm willing to yield the stage to someone that actually has monkey fashion show - related material. So it is done. What I don't get is why my page dropped off the results entirely. Hopefully, now that Rubidium has linked here on the aformentioned topic, I'll soon be back in business, but it's in google's hands now. Only time will tell...

Sunday, March 02, 2003

Well I've actually built up quite a backlog of postable material but I'll be releasing it slowly over the course of the week because I don't anticipate anything eventful happening while I'm back home for the week. Today, a few link updates are in order:

- Reebok has released several new Terry Tate clips, which are at least on par with the first installment. Definitely worth looking at.

- As prediced, I am now the internet's premiere source for monkey fashion show - related material.